Recent rereading of Plato’s, Apology I came across the classic bit of fluff “…,the unexamined life is not worth living,…”. I was caught off guard as I felt my eyes roll over the phrase quicker than expected. The rest of the dialogue had my eyes lingering on every word as it had become extremely dramatic and entertaining. I found myself drawn to think by my seeming automatic dismissal of the phrase.

I felt strongly that if I had encountered it with virgin eyes it would have been something I would have elbowed Marissa reading next to me and say “listen to how good this is.” but instead I glossed over with extra speed. I guess this is a testament to its inclusion over and over in my life - misquoted and mangled in highbrow dinner conversation between bites, bottom third of a poster dimly lit the dusty corner of a lecture hall, given as the dramatic line of a conciliatory post-game debrief huddle the embarrassing little league hockey game. Repeated again and again, but only in this moment catching not the quality of the words, but the speed that my eyes glanced over them did I really give it thought.

Socrates in this section calls it “disobedience to God” to live without “to talk every day about virtue and… examining myself and others…” and truly I find this assertion too modest. Now under forced and carful re-reading it feels less like a quippy piece of rhetoric and more like a fundamental law of reality.

Reading a syllabus for my brother's discrete mathematics course I found myself chewing the concept of a ‘discrete quantity’ in my head. Socrates wasn’t pointing out some sort of behavior we ought to do, but a fact about a human life. A life that is in fact quantized. Humanity has a quantity and quality moment to moment - examined or not. Human life has a length, a condition, a place. Like not thinking about why you stay on the ground does not free you from the pull of gravity. Drifting along untethered from the measures of your life will not earn you freedom from reality.

To lift an entire passage from Seneca - “It is not that we have a short space of time, but that we waste much of it. Life is long enough, and it has been given in sufficiently generous measure to allow the accomplishment of the very greatest things if the whole of it is well invested. But when it is squandered in luxury and carelessness, when it is devoted to no good end, forced at last by the ultimate necessity we perceive that it has passed away before we were aware that it was passing. So it is—the life we receive is not short, but we make it so, nor do we have any lack of it, but are wasteful of it. Just as great and princely wealth is scattered in a moment when it comes into the hands of a bad owner, while wealth however limited, if it is entrusted to a good guardian, increases by use, so our life is amply long for him who orders it properly.”

Ultimate necessity comes for every life. Ignoring the measure does not break the fact. With diligent obedience, investment, and measure even the simple or short life is sufficiently generous.

“…,the unexamined life is not worth living,…” was not spoken as a flaccid call to generally compare an outcome or spend more time thinking. It now rings in my ears as an ancient desperate call to realize that without your examination you cannot even begin to live or love the gift you have been given. Without your diligence and virtue you will wake up facing final call without ever having noticing what has already passed through your fingers.

Schedule and use of my time has been a cyclical and ‘evergreen’ topic of thought, effort, and discussion over my entire life.

However, in your own journey to be educated, your efforts to upright in your own life, and through our -often-heated- discussions I have found myself thinking differently on the topic than any of the years previous.

The Word:

Thumos (θυμός) is the word that brought together many of the topics over the last few months into a clean package. Literally meaning ‘chest’ or ‘breath’ it was utilized as a core underpinning concept to early philosophy.

The Hellenistic era Greeks though of their own soul not as a singular being or entity. Dividing their soul into three ‘parts’ or ‘urges’ - Logos (λογιστικόν), Thumos (θυμός) and Eros (ἐπιθυμητικόν). For me, the quickest way to understand is a kind of word association:

• Logos, Thumos, Eros

• Logic, Will, Desire

• Thought, Passion, Appetite

• God, Man, Animal

• Reason, Spirit, Desire

• Head, Chest, Stomach/Groin.

To balance the parts of your soul was the highest achievement of a truly free man. Thinking too much was to be trapped in the world of forms. To be commanded by lust or appetite was to live no differently than a beast. To be capital F - ‘Free Man’ required reined in balance of all the urges of your spirit.

What caught my attention was the idea that these ‘mental’ concepts were, for the Greeks, actually expressed by the balance of the actual parts of your body. Plato was teaching not some stuffy, bookish philosophy of the thinking frail but a kind of ‘martial art’ for a warrior/scholar. The balancing of mind and body. Any long look at art of the era you can FEEL the focus the Greeks have on the proportions of the body. These three concepts are the WHY behind Classical and Hellenistic art body obsessions.

The balanced body is where that spirit springs forth and the only worthy vessel of that spirit.

In Plato’s time, he focused much of his attention on developing Men’s Logos\Reason. In deep self-reflection after our discussion I realized that I am not a headless body requiring a little though to rein in my wild passions. Not dutiful and loyal set of horses that need a charioteer to show them the road. Reflection revealed a chestless homunculus - all head, stomach, and dick!

Most of my “plans” and actions are loaded heavily with complicated mind-numbing chains of logic, or basil animal like behavior.

So little does my ‘breath’ or fire in my belly check his two brothers. Rarely does my passion spike when the other two are talking. So rather than bore you with complicated sets of Logic instead I am beginning to raise the energy of my life.

I want to detail you a schedule that is infused with clear objective. To develop my breath. I want to save whatever will is left and strengthen this neglected part of my soul. Not construct yet another a beautiful Fabergé egg of ‘processes’ or brute a few days of guilt and adrenalin driven mania.

The Cycle:

I first encountered the idea of a ‘Mother Recipe’ trying to make use of some particularly good strawberries, deep into my fourth or fifth YouTube recipe video for poundcake.

Before Industrial standardization - human life was not measured in minutes, pounds, and inches. More often than not it was measured in parts, days, or handfuls. So… how do you recreate an ‘authentic’ 16th century poundcake? One Part Butter, One Part Flour, One Part Sugar. For early ‘Mother Recipies’ questions like “What kind of flour?” or “How much of each ingredients?” is met with a resounding “Who cares”

Get roughly right and through your own intuitions, make it better next time.

It sounds ridiculous but much of the great art, thought, and culture I enjoy was made by people not measuring. Cathedrals were being built without calculus. Beautiful streets. Intricate fabrics. Achieved through repeated action and relentless pace of trial an error. Smart people analyzing and copying masterworks and maybe MAYBE at the height of mastery adding a little spin. This is a concept told over and over by many brains better than mine.

In the ‘Mother Recipe’ rabbit hole I found something different, Schedule. Unlike stacking stones until they stand, baking bread requires timed and specific action.

Let a dough over rise? Bad bread. Let a dough rest too little? Bad Bread. Forget to start a pot? No dinner. In my greatest and most commanding vice (food) I find peeking out of history a really interesting look at a long-term planning cycle.

The baking and cooking women and men of the preindustrial world used a off cut of meat from one meal as the base of a sauce form the next. The day was scheduled not in hours but by the time between kneading dough. There is an organic chemist like delight of each part of a meal running into another. Often preparations were setting aside meals months in advance!

No clock, no cups, often illiterate. Producing better food than I am capable of. Speak nothing of the great chiefs of a noble house or a legendary eatery. To achieve that requires a vision of the future and a command of the present sorely lacking from my spirit.

The Goal:

“The unexamined life is not worth living” - Socrates

When I really examine my life -with a few notable exceptions- I am at best apathetic and unfortunately often revolted.

My shelf next to my bed? My Wardrobe? My Food? The placement of my things?

Not though out.

My Body? The state of my Education? The state of my Soul? My delight in life?

Abysmal.

Every part of my daily life screams out for my attention, my care, and my time. Every book decoration, and hair on my head demands that I order it.

Through the ‘way’ or steps necessary to order my life is not unclear or difficult. I do not really WANT to take the reigns. I have the horsepower, and the thought to accomplish plenty. I lack the ability rather to generate a WHY.

So, I will utilize the Logos and Eros that cripples my life’s energy to with the singular goal to awaken greater energy, passion, breath. Thumos.

The Plan:

I -like a trainable dog- am food motivated.

To quote my favorite line of the letter you have me read “I am convinced that a light supper, a good night's sleep, and a fine morning, have sometimes made a hero of the same man, who, by an indigestion, a restless night, and rainy morning, would have proved a coward.”― Lord Chesterfield

Hero and Coward are a distinct experience for me. I use my food to dull my senses and get over a rough awkward patch where some greater will power would have been of better use. I do the same thinking. It’s often do dull the uneasy feeling resting on my chest that I drown by twisting my thoughts into a comfortable and unsolvable knot.

So here is the high level idea. Subject to refinement.

1. Puppy Training - I eat well when I accomplish a task I want, no exception. As stupid as it sounds, this is unfortunately the depths I need to climb out of. Even as simple as a few pushups or saying something I meant to. I need to begin to reward steps forward, rather than escaping into food and other vices.

2. Breakfast Supremacy - ‘Better Bryan’ is most present and in control with a large breakfast, nearly non-existent lunch, and a hearty dinner after a nice lift. Fresh bread, eggs, meat, and cheese are wonderful cyclical needs for an optimal Bryan morning that require planning, prep, and commitment early in the day. You will have already tried some of the mini-loaves of fresh bread from my new plan, but my night and morning will be defined in the labor of love for a morning feast. Giving me the consistent and reliable start and end.

3. Like a Greek statue - No surprises here. Balance head, chest, and stomach. This will be achieved through my consistent efforts in the gym and the reduction of the obvious stomach. Balance the vessel and fix the mobility issues -hamstring, hip, and shoulder- that sitting around all day and the horizon of 30 has cursed me with. I will be a perfect slave to the weights and the physical therapist. AKA, no dinner until the body tasks are complete.

4. Writing and Will - This letter is an early prototype of what I want for my life. I wish to be articulate and to be able to generate content that can be consumed. The ebb and flow of my creativity will set the pace, but I will generate ‘content’ every day until I can articulate better some real goal.

I am against the strict establishment of blocked time as I have plenty of organic cycles that demand not my timely adherence but ANY adherence at all.

I’ll continue to refine and I will discuss with you soon.

-Bryan McAleer

Subscribe now